A question I get asked a lot is:
“What is coaching?” Or “What do you do Rob?” and it’s actually damn difficult to put into words. I feel coaching is something you have to experience in order for you to embrace the power of it.
So today I’m going to give you a greater insight into what coaching actually is … and isn’t (the way I do it. (-; )
It all starts with a powerful conversation.
But, let’s skip a few beats and get straight to the journey. If you feel that this is something you’re searching for once you’ve read this, then you’ll have the chance to experience a powerful conversation at the bottom of this post.
Coaching is an experience where two people (coach and client) go on an amazing journey together. An adventure in creating the extraordinary.
You have dreams, crazy ones, maybe dreams that you’re not consciously aware of. They lay dormant in the back of your mind.
What I do is facilitate and guide you in creating those dreams, your vision, the magic.
You may call me crazy, or tell me that’s impossible.
But that’s what I love. The impossible.
When I reflect on my story and where I’ve come from to where I am today. Six years ago I would have told myself I was crazy. Even when I look back a year from today, I still would have said it was an impossible dream.
A coaching relationship goes much deeper than any friendship.
You have friends. Probably lots of them that advise you.
Say “yes” to you and tell you things that please you.
My job isn’t to please you. Be a “Yes” man or even a friend.
My job is to serve you and serve you powerfully in creating what you want in the world.
As we take this adventurous journey there will be lots of exploration and ‘digging deep’ into the reasons to what’s holding you back from creating the extraordinary.
POWER of conversation is key here, so you must be willing to get uncomfortable, vulnerable and authentic within the exploring.
Coaching with me is not for the faint-hearted either. I will challenge you. I will ask you to lean into your edge and cross the line of your comfortability threshold. While at the same time, feeling safe and secure in doing so.
I must stress that I’m not an accountability coach that’s going to ask you if you have “done-this-and-done-that yet.” That’s what a motivator does.
I believe a motivator doesn’t serve. It does the exact opposite. It disempowers a person in the choices they are making rather than empowering them.
Motivation comes from an external source which tends to create short-term change that will keep you going around and around in vicious circles, rather than see the life-long transformation you desire.
You do want a life-long transformation, don’t you?
Coaching is an investment, not a cost.
Investing in coaching and my own coach has transformed my life.
Yes, I could have gone and bought a new car or the very latest 4K TV-or-even gone on holiday. But I didn’t. I decided to invest that money into myself and it has paid me back ten fold.
Anything else would have been a cost. I have known people who have spent money on those kinda things. Like the latest gadgetry or holiday as an escapism from life. Thinking that it would bring them some happiness …
… and it did for a short period. Until reality showed up again. If you feel that coaching is a cost rather than an investment, then we probably wouldn’t be the right ‘fit’ for a coaching relationship.
What coaching isn’t.
I also want to get into what coaching ‘isn’t’ because some people’s idea’s of what it is are a little mixed between a psychiatrist and therapist.
Images of lying on a couch and letting it all out. Or going to some scary place in your past.
“Opening a can of worms” is one of the expressions I’ve heard.
It’s none of that. I’m not Dr. Frasier Crane.
It’s about moving forwards and creating.
Ever heard the phrase “You get what you focus on”?
If you’re always looking back there and that’s where your focus lies.
That’s what you’ll get.
Why do you think you hear this a lot …
… “My therapist is fantastic, I’ve been seeing him for the past 14 years”
I’m going to contradict myself here-and-I don’t care if I do.
Coaching isn’t therapy. Therapy is about fixing people.
Coaching is about creating and in its own way, is kinda therapy.
I told you I would contradict myself (-:
Let me explain what I mean by that.
It’s what I experienced when I was in my darkness.
By being creative and putting out into the world what I wanted,
helped me in many ways.
A lot of my therapy and self-development came from creating and serving people. Not from reading a ton of self-help books.
I tried that. You have too. Drowning in a sea of information just looking for a quick fix, a cure or something to help you. And then??
Self-Help becomes Shelf-Help. More books that you either don’t or can’t read because you’re so overwhelmed with knowledge.
I look at it from a different perspective – Less = More.
Coaching isn’t me telling you what to do. I would associate that with more of a mentor’s role than a coach. A mentor usually gives you their strategy that got them their results and instructs you on how to implement that strategy.
A coach is someone who extracts information rather than instructs. Click on the video thumbnail below to listen to Andrea’s story.
And you may have experienced this pain before where you have been given a full-proof-plan or strategy to freedom. Whether that be financial, a habit or some other kinda freedom.
But, you couldn’t execute it and you struggled to understand why. Still do. Maybe others had the same plan and they got great results. Why not you? That’s the question that niggles you, isn’t it?
Listen, I could give you all the ‘How To’s’ in the world but if they aren’t meeting you where you’re at in your journey, they will NEVER work.
Instructing isn’t my game plan because it approaches it from a-one-size -fits-all. That doesn’t work either. You are not ‘ALL’.
You are ‘UNIQUE.’
That’s my take on what coaching is and isn’t.
I hope you enjoyed reading it and thank you for doing so.